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May 25, 2022, 4:33 a.m.
beans

I've come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch-ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right. He took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my FUCKING wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the earth. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the MOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

May 25, 2022, 4:31 a.m.
beans

stardust run to the polls

May 25, 2022, 8:29 p.m.
AmberlynnWEED

is that… a GIRL?!!!? Uhhhhhhhhhhhh girls? uhhhhhhhhhhhhh like, here? *starts sweating* uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *starts drooling* uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *wide eyed* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts farting* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts shitting with bloodshot eyes* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *poopie leaking out of my shorts* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts convulsing which makes the shit run down my shaved legs even faster* UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH *gets a boner* UUUHHH-UHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUHHHH-UHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH *passes out*

June 1, 2022, 6:42 a.m.
beans

hey

Aug. 12, 2016, 2:23 a.m.
higaisha

Broke my never-leave-the-house streak of a couple good months trying to find an Eevee that was in the sighted section. It disappeared. Paras appeared under sightings as I was walking back home. What is the truth.

Dec. 17, 2016, 7:30 p.m.
Pasteluma

I redownloaded the game just so I could use this. I also made a new account because wynaut :P I'd love to walk around and catch mons but it kinda just snowed s o

May 9, 2022, 9:26 p.m.
AmberlynnWEED

I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

May 25, 2022, 4:38 a.m.
beans

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

July 9, 2022, 5:53 p.m.
ShowTheHentai

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July 29, 2022, 9:26 p.m.
ShowTheHentai

what time is it? 12 11 ^ 1 10 | 2 time for u 9 ⊙————> to stop 8 4 hosting this 7 5 website 6

May 25, 2022, 4:34 a.m.
beans

Hewwo? hewwo, hewwo! uh, i wanted tuwu wecowd a message fow uwu, tuwu hewp uwu get settwed in own youw fiwst night. Um, i actuawwy wowked in thawt office befowe uwu. I’m...finishing up my wast week now as a mattew of fact so...I know iwt cawn be a wittwe ovewwhewming, but i’m hewe tuwu teww uwu: thewe’s nothing tuwu wowwy abouwt, uhh, you’ww duwu fine! so...wet’s juwst focus own getting uwu thwough youw fiwst week. Ok? uh...wet’s see. Fiwst thewe’s an intwoductowy gweeting fwom the company i’m supposed tuwu wead. Eeh it’s kind of a wegaw thing, uwu know. ‘wewcome tuwu fweddy fazbeaw’s pizza: a magicaw pwace fow kids awnd gwown-ups awike, whewe fantasy awnd fun come tuwu wife. Fazbeaw entewtainment iws nowt wesponsibwe fow damage tuwu pwopewty ow pewson. Upon the discovewy of the damage ow death has occuwwed, a missing pewson’s wepowt wiww be fiwed within ninety days ow as soon as pwopewty awnd pwemise have bewn thowoughwy cweaned awnd bweached awnd the cawpets have bewn wepwaced. Bwah, bwah, bwah.’ now thawt might sound bad, i know, but thewe’s weawwy nothing tuwu wowwy abouwt! uhh, the animatwonic chawactews hewe duwu get a bit quiwky at night, but duwu i bwame thewm? no! if i wewe fowced tuwu sing...those same stupid songs fow twenty yeaws awnd i nevew got a bath? i’d pwobabwy be a bit iwwitabwe at night too. So wemembew: these chawactews howd a speciaw pwace in the heawts of chiwdwen awnd uwu need tuwu show thewm a wittwe wespect. Wight? ok. So juwst be awawe: the chawactews duwu tend tuwu wandew a bit. Uhh, they’we weft with sowme kind of ‘fwee-woaming mode’ at night. Uhhh...something abouwt theiw sewvos wocking up if they get tuwned off fow too wong? uhh...they used tuwu wandew duwing the day too, but then thewe was the bite of '87. Yeah... it’s amazing thawt the human body cawn wive without the fwontaw wobe, ya know? now concewning youw safety: the onwy weaw wisk tuwu uwu as the night watchmen hewe, if any, iws the fact thawt these chawactews...uhh, if they happen tuwu see uwu aftew houws pwobabwy won’t wecognize uwu as a pewson. They'ww p-most wikewy see uwu as a metaw endoskeweton without iwt's costume own. Now since thawt's against the wuwes hewe at at fweddy fazbeaw's pizza, they'ww pwobabwy twy tuwu...fowcefuwwy stuff uwu inside a fweddy fazbeaw suit. Um, now thawt wouwdn't be so bad if the suits themsewves wewen't fiwwed with cwossbeams, wiwes awnd animatwonic devices especiawwy awound the faciaw awea. So, uwu couwd imagine having youw head fowcefuwwy pwessed inside owne of those couwd cause a bit of discomfowt... awnd death. Uh, the onwy pawts of uwu thawt wouwd wikewy see the wight of day again wouwd be youw eyebawws awnd teeth whewn the pop out the fwont of the mask, heh. Y-yeah they down't teww uwu these things whewn uwu sign up. But hey, fiwst day shouwd be a bweeze. I'ww chat with uwu tomowwow. Uh, check those camewas, wemembew tuwu cwose the doows onwy if absowutewy necessawy. Gotta consewve powew. Awwight, goodnight.

May 31, 2022, 3:46 p.m.
ILOVERESHIRAM